Thursday August 30

It was Madi's first cross country meet today.

I didn't see much nerves at all in her.

Actually, middle school has done some real wonders for this girl.

Go figure.

Maybe it has something to do with feeling older and more responsible....

But she was excited to see what the meet was all about.

We picked Cassi up from school and headed to Lake Hazel.

The competing teams bus showed up late.....so they all got started late.

No big deal.

The girls went first.

They started off at a really fast pace.

The first two girls were really booking it and the rest just tried to keep up.

Madi did really well.

I believe it was a mile and a half they ran.

Madi's time came in at 14:47.

It will be fun to see how her time improves over the next few weeks.

I told her that the only thing she needs to beat is her own time.

She was happy with how she did.

There were some really fast runners, and some really slow runners.

Madi did a great job and it was fun watching her, even though it was hard to keep track of where they were the whole time :)

 

 

Madi knew these girls last year.

It is fun to have them on the same team as her.

They seem like really good kids.

 

 

Almost to the finish.

She really pushed it hard at the end to get through the finish.

Way to go Bell!

 

 

When we got home she opened her present she didn't get yesterday.

I was gonna take her shoe shopping for new running shoes.

But then today, we went to pick up Brent's truck from the shop on the way to Elsie's PT.

But the truck wasn't done yet......so Dad dropped us off and took Port with him to waste some time.

He went to Big5 and found these great shoes for $25.

The right size for her and they looked great....so he got them.

She loves them and she looks like a pro in them :)

*****

This morning did not go smoothly.

Not bad....just not perfect.

I took Elsie to drop her off this morning.

I wasn't sure if she would be good with me dropping her off.

Cassi had taken the bus to school, so when Elsie and I got to school, we waited to see her get off.

We saw Cassi and she was happy and excited to be with her friends and at school.

Well, I took Elsie around to her classroom and the bell rang.

Elsie started to get a little worried look on her face, but I tried to distract her by talking with all the other little girls about their cool backpacks.

Well, all of the sudden Cassi come running around the corner bawling her eyes out.

Elsie started to fuss a bit.

I made sure Cassi wasn't hurt, then I made her go around the corner so Elsie wouldn't freak out cause of Cassi freaking out.

I walked Elsie in and she hung her backpack up and away she went.

Happy as a clam.

I can't believe how great the last few days have been for her.

She was so tired after today....hopefully she will have good energy tomorrow :)

Anyway, then I went back out to Cassi.

She was in a full panic attack.

I don;t know if anyone has ever been around Cassi when she gets like this....but she is absolutely impossible to talk with.

I tried to find out what happened.

She just kept saying her tummy hurt and she wanted to go home.

I told her she was probably just nervous.

Over and over again we tried to talk through it.

Finally she said to me she didn't want to go to class cause she didn't have any of her friends with her.

I told her that was crazy, and that everyone is Cassi's friend.

I told her a little story of a little boy who came up to me before Cassi got off the bus and asked if Cassi was here today.

I told him she was and that she would get off the bus soon.

I asked if he knew her and he told me she was in his class and they sat by each other and he thought she was pretty cool.

I told her that story and I think it kinda helped.

Cassi is one of those kids that people seems to flock too.

She is fun to be around, funny and hyper.

Everything a kid loves, right :)

She was still crying as I walked closer to her classroom.

We stood outside her doorway and I gave her a big giant hug for a long time.

That girl needs love.

I know we all need love, but she is, in a way, needy.

We are trying to figure her out and what makes Cassi have these little panic attacks.
They happen at bedtime alot.
A couple years ago it was so bad that we took her to the dr and she said she suffered from kind of a seperation anxiety.

Cassi is always willing to try anything, she puts on a big, strong happy front, but on the inside she is our most vulnerable child.

She looks for and needs acceptance.

And like I said a few days ago, I feel like we are always picking on Cassi for doing this or doing that, or not doing this.

It isn't like we do it any more to her than the other kids, but Cassi takes it harder.

Cassi's little heart gets bruised so easily.

As I held her I asked if she wanted me to say a little prayer to help her feel calm.

So we did.

We said a prayer and then I held her a little longer.

I watched her hang up her backpack and go to her seat.

She looked over at me with her poor little puffy eyes and I showed her the 'I love you' sign.

She smiled that sweet smile and signed it back to me, and I knew she was good.

I wrote her a little note and stuck it on her desk when I went to pick up Elsie after kindergarten.

She needs those little things, those little reminders that she is loved so much.
I need to be better about doing it more often.

It is so funny.

I have worried so much about Madi starting Middle school and Elsie starting Kindergarten.

I thought there was no problem with Cassi.

Guess I was wrong.
And I don't think I need to worry....I think she will do good tomorrow.
It was just an off day.
I think riding the bus this morning threw her off.
All morning she begged to go to the bus stop and I kept telling her that it wouldn't come for another hour, half hour, etc.
So maybe that was my fault by focusing more on the telling her NO all morning instead of making it a nice smooth morning for her.

We are working harder to make sure she knows how much she is loved.

She is such an amazing part of our family and I want her to always KNOW that.

And always remember it.